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Wouldn’t it be fantastic if kittens came out of textbooks? I think I would find my Sociology and Popular Culture reader a lot more fascinating if a dinky tabby mewed at me from between the pages. Yep, university is back and it was a somewhat crazy week. It was my first week of full classes (tutorials and labs don’t start until second week) and so far things are looking good. I definitely have my work cut out for me, but I’m excited by my courses (two psychology and one sociology). Also, fatigue hasn’t set in yet.

I haven’t written about the Christchurch* earthquake yet. One week ago today it struck at 12:51pm and changed a whole city. A city that’s nerves were already brittle from the previous September 4th earthquake and the thousands of aftershocks they’d experienced over the following five months. A city that, up until last week, had got away with no lives lost. But now loss of lives is 154, expected to rise to about 240.

Two hundred and forty. Christchurch natives, fellow Kiwis, foreigners, men, women, children. The earth just shook too much that day.

Collapsed Pyne Gould Corporation building.

Collapsed Canterbury Television building. Photo courtesy: AP.

Extensively damaged Catholic Cathedral in the central city. Photo courtesy: NZPA / David Wethey.

Bus hit by falling debris. Photo courtesy: stuff.co.nz

In New Zealand the degree of separation is just two. Not six, as in so many other parts of the world, but two. I don’t know anyone who doesn’t know someone from Christchurch. Directly, I know several people from The Garden City,  and none have been physically harmed. Some have homes that are ok, others do not. What strikes me the most, however, is the emotional trauma they’ve all experienced. This trauma is what is likely to last so much longer than the clean-up of neighbourhoods and reconnecting of water and sewerage systems. For most of the people I know, the emotional affects have been occurring since last year, made so much worse by this most recent quake. The devastation of so much of the city, the loss of lives, livelihoods, and beloved areas is something every Christchurchian will be grieving for. Every New Zealander who knows the city. Every tourist who visited and fell in love with the place.

Landslides in Redcliffs near Christchurch. Photo courtesy: AFP.

Royal New Zealand Air Force image from their aerial surveillance of areas affected in Christchurch. The watery parts you see (that are not obvious river) are due to soil liquefaction. Photo courtesy: NZ Defence Force.

The city I lived in for eighteen months as a five- and six-year-old is forever changed now. I know that it will be rebuilt wonderfully and that residents will return to a new and hopefully better-than-before normality. If it takes the whole country to do it, we will do it.

*Please note I use ‘Christchurch’ to widely include the surrounding areas, such as Lyttleton, which is near where the earthquake was centred. It has also been so damaged and is a place I remember fondly from my time living in the area.

Centre of Lyttelton. Photo courtesy: nationnews.com.

Damaged Time Ball Tower in Lyttleton. Photo courtesy: kiwi247.com.

My weekend ended on a crazy-busy note yesterday! I helped my boyfriend move to his new place, and by that what I mean is we packed and moved everything yesterday. Yeah, he wasn’t super-organised, but he had only found the place last Thursday. Fortunately my parents helped us move the furniture and most of everything else

Josh and I even managed to get his new room set up fairly well. Most clothes and books are unpacked, bed is all done, his brand new plasma TV is set up (of course, hehe). For a one-day job I think we did pretty well considering it was only 4 people for a few hours, then the 2 of us. The worst thing though was the dust, which I’m allergic to (well, technically allergic to dust mite poop but thinking about that would turn me into a germiphobe). I sneeze my butt off most of the day and paid for it with a rare bout of asthma. I don’t have any asthma medication anymore but I really wished that I had last night. I haven’t had breathing difficulties like that since I was much younger and it really sucked. I just feel so lucky that I don’t have to experience that often, like so many people do.

This morning on the way home I went into university to do a couple of things before my classes start on Wednesday. I managed to sell one of my old textbooks back to the bookstore for $70! I was so stoked as I wasn’t sure I would get that much for it at all. It’s still nearly a 50% markdown on what I paid for it, but it’s better than nothing or having it sit around unused. So yeah, this is basically my bus money.

Being the first day of semester, campus was obviously packed. I scored a free bottle of drink and was going to try to get more free stuff but the lines were nuts and I got over the pull of OMG-free-stuff-!!11!1! pretty quickly, haha. As I’m sure many of you know, the first couple of weeks back at uni are crazy full of people. All the first year students starting and trying to figure everything out; they’re like swarming bees! But it’s ok because I was once one of them so I know what it’s like. Everything is so new and exciting, you feel more adult all of a sudden, but also there is this sense of ‘being a student’ and what that entails. Like booze nights and various crazy antics. I didn’t really experience that student life, nor have I any intention to either. I think if I lived closer to campus I definitely would socialise more with fellow students, but the travel I have to do takes up so much time that I really just cannot be bothered going out anywhere at the end of the day. I want to go home, have a nice meal, and relax. Quietly.

A month ago I really wasn’t looking forward to going back to school, I was definitely feeling jaded by the whole experience. I had finally caught up in energy and was feeling so happy and alive, so creative and free, that the thought of having to go back to regular classes, assignments, and 2 hours on a bus every day was the worst. Now, however, I’m feeling much more excited. I think my classes will all be quite interesting, especially psychology. A lot of work, obviously, but enjoyable at the same time.

Happy Monday!

Johnny Cash is one of my all-time favourites. Do I even need to explain why? Probably to many people, but, bah!, everyone should love the Man in Black. I plan to introduce my future foetuses to his music.

‘God’s Gonna Cut You Down’, on Cash’s posthumously released album American V: A Hundred Highways in 2006. I like how the video shows lots of other musicians (and a few non-musos) in tribute to Johnny.

There really is no escaping it: I’m a shoe and bag addict. Below are the ones I’m currently drooling over. Man, I wish I could buy them all…

1. Eastland Falmouth Oxford / 2. UO Tan Navajo Bootie Slipper / 3. Minnetonka Kilty Moccasin / 4. Minnetonka Tramper Boot / 5. Dolce Vita Suede Tassel Loafer / 6. Eastland Lug Lace-Up Boot / 7. Free People El Paso Suede Moccasin / 8. Vans Wellesley Hiker / 9. Vans Hollie Plaid Authentic Lo Pro / 10. Vans Suede Zapato Del Barco / 11. Vans Sophie

1. BDG Twill Lady Carryall / 2. Ecote Coated Canvas Hiking Backpack / 3. Free People Somerset Backpack / 4. Deena & Ozzy Straw Geo Weekender / 5. Loop Decoupage Checkbook Wallet

My style is usually pretty eclectic. At the moment I’m drawn to Native American influences and comfortable flat shoes. Even tomboy styles, which is unusual for me since I’m definitely a dress lover. Maybe it’s the cooler months calling for warmth and layers?

Lately I’ve been having a bit of a hard time remembering that I’m actually a good, likeable, lovable person worthy of my loved-ones’ esteem. At the moment I seem to only remember all the parts of myself that I’m unhappy with and it’s beginning to take ‘the blues’ in the direction of depression as my anxiety surrounding myself and my life increases.

Most of my insecurities have always been related to me as a person and my personality rather than how I look. While I definitely had times as a teenager where I cringed in the mirror I never felt very desperate over my appearance. Now, that seems to have caught up with me! I gained a lot of weight last year, about 9 kilograms (19.8lbs), and the change in my shape has been really shocking for me. I hate wearing jeans because they’re too tight around my middle; I hate most of my other clothes, even well-fitting ones, because I feel awful in them. Frumpy.

Other things have been weighing on my mind too, like my lack of close friends that live anywhere near me. It’s been a long time since I’ve had a decent close friendship with someone who I’m not in a romantic relationship with or related to. I’ve always been awkward and quiet, rarely liking to share about myself (hense the lack of detailed personal posts on this blog*) and this makes it hard for me to make friends beyond acquaintances, sitting together in class, or going for more than the occasional coffee. I keep people at a distance, for good reasons, but it’s unhealthy when you want to make friends! You just can’t do it without putting yourself out there and being willing to suffer the disappointment if it turns out you won’t be great buddies after all.

I really need to work on my acceptance of perfection not existing. I will never be perfectly right with everything I do, nor will I be liked by everyone, just as I don’t like everyone I meet. I do not have to be in competition with every women on the planet to see who wins the title of Most Awesome Female Ever. I probably wouldn’t feel that last point so acutely if I hadn’t been hurt by some girls in my past. But there you have it; the competition between women – one of the most horrible feelings for me because I would rather being cheering other girls on. How on earth do I get over this (if you have any advice please get in touch)?

What do you do when you feel insecure? How have you become a more secure person?

*Even as I write this post I am not sure I will actually make it public. Sharing myself with others is so very scary. What if I’m weird, not likeable, not funny, etc? What if people just don’t get me? So many silly questions that just shouldn’t matter, but for some reason they matter to me.

So it’s Valentine’s Day tomorrow and because Josh and I can’t see each other then we did Valentine’s on Friday night when he came over. I made him creme brulee and he got me one of the most epic gifts I’ve received in my whole adult life.

LEGO! I adore Lego, always have. I’m the kind of adult who will sit down with a box of Lego and go nuts. I’m the kind of auntie who secretly wishes her neices and nephews will get Lego for birthdays and Christmas so that I can make it for with them. So getting this Ninjago Lego set was the highlight of my week.

My desktop, but not the computer screen kind. Earlier in the week I moved some things around and now it looks like this:

Except there should be a blue lamp on the right, but we have a guest staying who’s using it.

And lastly, my new pencil case for university. Originally I was going to sew one but when I saw this I had to get it. OWLS! It came with a matching swimming bag as well, though it’s kid-sized so I don’t think I could even fit my beach towel in it, haha.

I hope you’ve all had a great weekend! Anything exciting happening? Or ordinary, whatever really.

I first heard ‘Get Some’ by Lykke Li last month via the TV and immediately liked it. It’s sounds so freakin’ good. I’ve been a fan of her’s since early 2009, though don’t follow her releases closely so I wasn’t aware of the new album Wounded Rhymes, due out on February 28. It was a pleasant and welcome surprise.

Lykki Li is one of those artists you just have to try. She won’t be to everyone’s taste, but you might find at least one or two songs you will love and listen to on repeat. Like this one! The video is brilliant and just the kind of thing I like (some may find it controversial).

Another awesome song off this same album is ‘I Follow Rivers’.

I used to do a Music Monday feature with varying regularity but grew to find it too demanding because sometimes I just didn’t feel like sharing a song I liked. More often than not it was because my current likes were the same as they were the week before (and the week before that), or from the same limited selection of artists and so on. So I stopped.

I still love sharing music though, because it’s such a big part of my life – of most peoples lives – and can evoke many emotions and memories for me. Sometimes they’re unpleasant but a lot of the time they’re positive and kind of bittersweet. I aim to share 100 songs on this blog. There is no time limit or maximum shares per week or whatever. Just when I feel like it. Sometimes I might share the history I have with the song, sometimes I won’t.

So, number one is Stand By Me by Ben E. King. I’ve loved this song very much since I was about 5 and over the years it’s become one of the two songs that I always think of whenever someone asks me what my favourite song ever is. I never used to think I could possibly narrow it down, but actually I can, and this song is one of them. Unfailingly I adore it. Sometimes it makes me cry, mostly it makes me think of my loved ones and how much I love them, appreciate their support and will always give them mine in return.

Also, it reminds me of a favourite movie of the same name. Yeah, that one with River Phoenix. Love it so much.

Afternoon, all! I love it when I open up my Bloglovin and discover so many fantastic posts, so here are some links for my favourite blog posts from around the web today. And an adorable bonus video.

Princeton, 1969 over at Miss Moss. Take a peak at photos of a few of the first women to ever attend Princeton University as undergraduates. Not only were they smart, but stylish too.

Yoo over at Desire To Inspire. A stunning selection of interiors and architecture by Yoo, the design partnership of property developer John Hitchcox and designer Philippe Starck.

White House Design at Home Reviews. Usually I’m not a big fan of predominantly white houses and interiors, but there is something about this Florida residence that makes it work for me. Still, not sure I’d want to live in it; I would have to spend a fortune on stain removal, however the pool may cancel that con out!

Colour Crush: Citron + Tangelo at Creature Comforts. Loving this colour combination; so bright and fresh. When I look at it I can almost taste citrus fruits. Is that weird?

Katey & Natey at Bower Power. Watch a clip of one of my favourite bloggers, Katie Bower, on the Nate Berkus Show (he’s designed interiors for Oprah). Her home was selected to be on his House Proud segment and it truly deserves it. The Bowers have done a beautiful job on their home and I find it truly inspiring since they did most of it themselves despite having had no prior DIY experience before they moved in!

Keep It Simple: Single Flower Arrangements over at Apartment Therapy. I love flowers and having them around, but, like the author, I’m not so good at arranging multiple types of flowers. Unless the look I’m going for is rustic, unorganised wild flowers. My mother is so good at flower arranging but I really did not inherit that talent.

Welcome: Father Rabbit! at Studio Home shows off some choice picks from new online store Father Rabbit, based in my city. Just this morning before I saw this post I was browsing a magazine which featured some of their products. I will most definitely be a future customer! (P.S., they ship internationally.)

Sentimental over at I go by Katie. Katie shares the story behind her sentimental diamond ring. So, so sweet!

And lastly, a sweet video, the world’s smallest stop motion movie, to be exact! Cleverly done and a lovely story! I found this video via Skunkboy Creatures.

Until next time, xo.