Photo by John Rawlings

Good morning, Monday! I’m feeling most excellent and rested after a great weekend; I hope you are, too.

Friday was a blunder of a day until the evening. I had a difficult exam (biopsychology) that afternoon which I had not done enough study for. The amount of information we had to learn was huge and I, unfortunately, had not prepared well for that throughout the semester. It was the worst exam I have ever had and I felt absolutely awful throughout, stuffed with anxiety. Despite the fact I am an anxious sort of person, ever since I started university I have been really proud of the fact that I am fairly cool when it comes to sitting my tests and exams. I get nervous beforehand, I feel the stress of studying, but once I’m in the room I manage to find a calm enough mental space to get the work done. I credit my sister in helping me accomplish this; she gave me some very sound advice before my first set of tests and I gave carried it with me over the last two years. However, on Friday, sitting in that chair and reading those questions and literally not knowing some of answers at all sent me to a mental and emotional place I never want to go again. I ended up in tears in the exam, just managing to hold myself together until I could leave, after which I promptly broke down while sitting on the steps of possibly the most beautiful building on campus. I was glad to have my hooded coat, so I could mostly cover myself for privacy. It was embarrassing. I had no tissues. I didn’t want to go to the restroom as it would require going inside and seeing people. Them seeing me. I just sat there and waited for Josh to pick me up on his way home from work, crying for a bit, hating myself, and then people-watching once my tears had slowed.

Fortunately the remainder of Friday was better. Josh and I went to see Green Lantern and had dinner out, and we did a bit of shopping too. Honestly, I have a ridiculous shopping problem. Some people are emotional eaters, drinkers, drug takers or gamblers. I shop. Bad day? Go buy something! It’s potentially terrible financially, but I never spend money I don’t have. And I do not have a credit card and I do not plan on having one until I really need to get a credit rating, which will not be for another good few years. When I do get one, it will also have a really small limit on it and I might keep it in a complicated card case with a puzzle I have to complete in order to unlock it, or something.

Anyway, on Friday I bought a pair of track pants and a new hoodie, then on Saturday I got another hoodie and a scarf. I also indulged in a chilli chocolate truffle and a chilli hot chocolate, both to die for. So I suppose that counts as emotional eating too? Or maybe just my sweet tooth, which seems to be increasingly worse lately, possibly from the influence of a certain dessert-loving girlfriend of mine.

Sunday was lazy. We woke up late, picked up a few things from the supermarket and grabbed KFC for brunch on the way home. Normally not a fast food I like. I hate to admit it, but I’m a McDonald’s girl. Sad but true! We hung out, played on the internet all day, and played guitar. Well, Josh played and I practices the two little pieces he taught me. It was such a nice way to wind down the week.

I’ll be back later with the last 8 weeks to a better me post!